Why do men tend to be subversive during a midlife crisis?
You may not need to bomb your life to be happy, and if there is a need to take it apart, it should be done in a thoughtful way not to ruin your loved ones.
Although men and women can experience a midlife crisis, there are differences in the way symptoms appear in each.
In an article on the British Telegraph, social article author Ada Calhoun says that the typical midlife crisis in men is about breaking things up, mostly sabotaging matrimonial homes, quitting their jobs, violating standards, and destroy their reputation.
As for women, according to many experts, they tend to calm down during the midlife crisis. They suffer in silence, eat their favorite foods a lot and watch long TV alone, or cry every afternoon on the way home or in the middle of the night, and they may also fall asleep and sleep awake with their eyes fixed on the ceiling.
Author Cathy Mayer and Certified Relationship Coach, in an article on “Liveabout“ website, says men go through the midlife crisis because they reach a certain age and realize that life is spending with them; They are afraid of the changes that come with old age or illness, or of becoming less attractive, and they are afraid of not achieving the goals they have set for themselves. Each of them is afraid that their choice of wife is a mistake.
As for women – according to Meyer – the midlife crisis often crosses them because they reach a certain age when they discover that they have finally had the opportunity to do everything they have postponed in life because of family care.
As mothers, they have a stronger relationship with their children, but as young people grow older and women find it time to think about their own needs, they will be surprised that those needs are not being met.
If a woman spends her days caring only for children, cooking, cleaning and putting her family’s needs before her, and if she has no outside interests, she runs the risk of midlife crisis.
Menopause is also a cause of the midlife crisis in women, signifying biological and psychological changes that make them wonder how they lived their lives and if they should make any changes to improve it. If a woman marries at a young age and gives birth to children at a young age, she may feel an intense urge to regain her youth, to change her dress style, etc.
Says psychologist Dr. Susan Albers – on the site “Health” – can lead to hormonal disturbances in women and the feelings that come with it to make women adjust quietly and because women generally care about them. Feelings and needs of others around them, these personal sufferings remain silent.
Teenage rebellion among men
Many men go through a stage where they think they can be happier and need to make a major life change sooner rather than later.
Calvin Colaroso, professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Diego, says that a true midlife crisis usually involves a desire to quickly change your whole life, like a man writing a letter to his wife, withdrawing his money from the bank, and moving. In another city without warning. He adds that this kind of midlife crisis does happen, but it’s rare.
As psychologist Lynn Margulies says, men make amazing choices; they experience an “adolescent-type insurgency” at this point in their life.
She says one of the sure signs of a man going through a midlife crisis is his feeling that he is trapped and desperately wants to act in a way that blows his life up, like leaving his family and feeling that his life no longer suits him.
Margulies believes that a midlife crisis in men can lead to devastation and rash decisions such as ending familiar life and relationships with the woman, and looking forward to relationships with younger ones or buying a car you can’t afford, but it all ends soon, leading to devastation.
What should men do?
Margulies says that just because you feel like you have to run away from your home, job, or marriage doesn’t mean you really have to. These feelings can actually indicate issues that need to be addressed, but they can also go away or change over time.
She adds: Be grateful for the good things in your life that make you happy, and ask yourself how you would feel if you took action that destroyed all of those blessings.
Colaroso also advises you to reveal what is inside yourself before making important decisions. Talk to someone you trust first.
On the other hand, men make many successful changes in their 40s and beyond, like going back to school, traveling the world, or starting their own business. Just make sure your new goals are practical and within reach.
Margulies advises avoiding destroying those you love. Indeed, you may not need to blow your life up to be happy, but if it is necessary to take it apart, then doing so needs to be thoughtful to not destroy your loved ones around you.
How do women act?
Dr. Albers recommends some ways to deal with a midlife crisis in women, including:
1- Be honest with yourself if you feel depressed or anxious, and don’t feel bad about yourself.
2- Understand your feelings sincerely to see what makes you happy and think about what you are devoting your time and energy to and what is working best for you.
3- Find out who is absorbing your energy, let go of toxic relationships, find new groups of friends or pursue your favorite hobbies; Do something for yourself.
4- Make your health a priority and contact your doctor to help you understand what is normal and help you control your emotions.
5- Know that you are not alone in experiencing a midlife crisis and talking to others about how you feel.